Teaser
Join us on this epic journey as our hero launches into the unknown, facing certain dangers and placing himself at personal sacrifice in the rescue of an ancient artifact left abandoned and neglected for decades. The story takes us from a small, quiet retirement community in the high desert of Southern California to the top of a mountain peak. Blood will be spilled, money will change hands, time will be waisted, mistakes will be made, and four-letter vocabularies will be stretched to the limit as our hero abandons family relationships and shirks personal responsibilities all in the search for inner beauty and the attempt to repair and render functional what is currently completely dysfunctional.
Is it too late for this salvage operation to be successful? Is our hero truly crazy as his wife, and closest companion of 42+ years claims? Are parts of this relationship (the machine, not the wife) so broken that even time cannot mend? Will he ever find out what the heck a 4" jointer is and what to do with it? Hear our hero say (in an election year): "I intend to clean up this whole operation". See for yourself the deer-in-the-headlights look as he attempts to find a response to the probing question Diane asks "So...what are you going to make with it once it's back together?"
But take heed, my friends, and be forewarned: The following story is a true but a very dirty one...venturing into the unknown, with new mysteries at every turn. Corrosive materials and dangerous devices, which could be once considered medieval torture devices, are used to uncover the truth beneath the grime and filth.
You continue at your own peril....
The Discovery
It was a hot mid-August afternoon in the high desert community of Calimesa, CA. Diane, my wife and closest friend for over 42 years, was giving her mother a much-needed haircut. Having no football to watch, I grabbed a weak flashlight, and with no protective clothing nor firearm, I decided to explore the much dreaded garage connected to the ‘Yellow House’. Located at the front of the five acres, this small, one-bedroom building was once a habitat for humans, but abandoned long ago. It is now used solely for storing seasonal artifacts (i.e. tons of Christmas stuff) and other archeological finds. The shed attached to the house was once the workshop and storage facility used by my father-in-law before he passed away in 1993.
Using a key to unlock the entrance to the shed, the door creaked open to reveal a dark room with floor-to-ceiling cobwebs, spiders, rats, and surely one or two ghosts. Wood debris once stored in the rafters now lay strewn on the shed floor in an apparent attempt of a remodeling exercise by the rodents. I ventured through the cobwebs (all while humming the theme song to Indiana Jones) towards the back of the shed where the treasure was hidden beneath dust, debris, rags, and *a-hem* layers of rodent poop.
I attempted to move the unit on its casters and found it to be quite heavy and difficult to roll. I realized that this was going to be a bigger effort than originally expected. Reinforcements and some heavy duty equipment were going to be required if this salvage operation was going to be successful.
The Extraction
It was August 24, 2012. Another hot and humid day in Calimesa. My wife and I arrived in the morning armed with a trailer, a 9000 lb capacity winch lashed to the high heavens to the back of the trailer, ramps, tools, gloves, hats, masks, log sleeve shirts, and a 1500 watt portable lamp ( I wanted to scare the snot out of anything still living inside the shed..and it’s common knowledge that ghosts don’t like bright lights).
We found Rusty still inside in all its glory.
We made a path through the cobwebs and wood debris and proceeded to unload everything off of the Shopsmith. Without the lead weights, iron castings, and extraneous crap...er...stuff which was stored on the Shopsmith unit, it rolled quite easily. We (my wife and I with my Mother-in-law standing on the side acting as coach, cheerleader, and part time lawyer should we hurt ourselves and decide to sue) were able to roll the unit out of the shed and onto the trailer without the need of the winch or the local high school football team.
Committed to leave no part behind, we continued to search through the dungeon for other hidden treasures and extraneous parts. As luck would have it, we stumbled on a bucket of antique Shopsmith parts, including the priceless Jacobs drill chuck. Wanting to press our luck no further, we packaged up the treasures, lashed everything down onto the trailer, and escaped to the mountains high above San Bernardino. Even Belloq would not be able to find us here. A New Home
Rusty has found his final resting place at Skyforest, CA.
......along with the remaining treasures.
Rusty's side kicks include a table saw, Jacobs drill chuck, speed changer, original A.O.Smith 3/4 hp motor, 12" disk sander, lathe tool rest, miter gauge, and a Magna 4" Jointer.
Time has taken its toll on Rusty. There is significant rust everywhere, the main carriage does not slide on the tubes, the quill/drill chuck unit doesn't retract automatically (a broken spring...or just a lot of gunk?), and the motor electrical cord is a disaster waiting to happen.
So now, the cleaning, scrubbing, soaking, and rebuilding process begins....stay tuned.
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